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Agent Xero: Hello there. I'm Agent Xero. Main heroine of The Modifyers. And it's time for The Modifyers: The Origin of Agent Xero. It features me, Agent Xero, Lacey Shadows, Mole, Katz, Baron Vain, Rat, and of course, the mysterious Fantome Noir.
Mole: Yeah! The babes! Well, grab a seat, sit back, relax, and enjoy the fanfic. There's nothing like a tale of a girl.
Agent Xero: That's sweet Mole. And don't forget the stay tuned after the fanfic for a very special Modifyers music video by CARTOON 65, which includes never before seen footage.
This Fanfic Has Been Modifyed From Its Not-So Original Version. It Has Been Formatted For Your Viewing Pleasure.
Created by Chris Reccardi and Lynne Naylor
The Origin of Agent Xero
[At the Maximum Secruity Prison]
John Helix: [he goes back to his prison cell] I hate being in prison. [he pulls out a Modifyers comic book] But I love this Modifyers comic book. I love the Modifyers.
Old Prison Guard: Hey! Whatcha got in there?
John: Uuuh... Nothing?
Old Prison Guard: Are you reading those Modifyers comic books?
John: What? No. I was just thinking about several murders I made. Hey! I give up! I read those comics!
Old Prison Guard: Yeah. I love the Modifyers. They made a TV series out of those comics, which in turn are based on a series of incidents.
John: Okay. Agent Xero's the prettiest of those comics, TV shows, Theatrical movies, Direct-to-Video movies, Made-for-TV movies, CD-ROM adventure games, video games, etc etc etc. But I don't know how she became Agent Xero. Can you tell me the story of her origins?
Old Prison Guard: Okay. Let me tell you about the never before heard origin of Agent Xero. It's filled with action, adventure, drama, mystery, suspense, and comedy, and even features the mysterious Fantome Noir for no reason. Ahem! A long time ago in a galaxy far far away. [Star Wars music plays]
John: I love that story since I was a kid. Hey! I meant Agent Xero's story!
Old Prison Guard: Oops. Sorry. I was a bit spaced out lately. Once upon a time, the year was 1946.
Old Prison Guard: The city is a place who babies can be jazz stars, citizens can be super heroes, everybody's gotta be something unless they're like the original Modifyers. Chris Reccardi and Lynne Naylor. They work for a super secret organization to solve mysteries and fight crime and save the world from the evil Baron Vain, and his army of henchmen.
[We see Chris and Lynne fighting villains]
Old Prison Guard: And in one fateful day, Lynne became pregnant. She was sent to the hospital, where she give birth to not one, not two, but three beautiful baby girls. Mina, Tina, and Pearl.
[Three baby girls are born]
John: Awww... How cute.
Old Prison Guard: Yep. Chris and Lynne retired so they can take care of their babies. But on that day, Baron Vain arrived.
[Baron Vain arrives at the Mansion]
Chris Reccardi: Hello?
Baron Vain: Hello there. I am Baron Vain. Leader of the EVIL Organization. I want your babies.
Lynne Naylor: Never! I won't give you my daughters!
Baron Vain: Very well. I have no choice but to burn down your mansion. [he lights a match]
Baron Vain: [he throws the match at the mansion, setting it on fire] Later!
Chris Reccardi: We need to protect those babies! [the mansion collapses]
Lynne Naylor: Oh no!
Katz: [he breaks into the burning mansion and sees Mina, but Tina and Pearl are missing]
Baron Vain: [laughing] The two babies are mine! [laughing] [he enters his sky ship, and flies, but Pearl's basket falls down to the ground] Uuuh... Make that one. I'll just name you Lacey Shadows.
Katz: [he grabs Mina's basket and leaves as the mansion collapses, leaving behind a pile as ash]
John: Agent Xero's real name is Mina? And she had sisters?
Old Prison Guard: Hey! Who's telling the story? And so after the mansion gets burned down, a man named Katz, chief of the Modifyers Organization Inc., takes little Mina to a very small place.
[At the Sanchez house]
Joe Sanchez: Hey! Who's out there?
Katz: Hello there. My name is Katz. Chief of the Modifyers Organization Inc. I have something to tell you. This girl's parents perished in a terrible fire.
Joe: That's terrible!
Katz: Terrible indeed. You need to take care of her as a guardian.
Katz: Ta-Ta for now.
Joe: Bye! Your name's Mina right? Sounds like a taco topping. Your parents are the Modifyers? I know everything about them. They fight those nasty Nazis, Japs, and Soviets at WWII. I'll just take care of you.
Old Prison Guard: And so Joe takes care of little Mina. He fed her, he bathed her, he changed her diapers, and more.
John: So sweet.
Old Prison Guard: Okay. 5 years later, Mina grew up to learn more about everything.
[5 Years Later]
Joe: What a beautiful morning! Mina? Mina?
Mina: Hi, Dad. I spend the whole night making this lovely dress.
Joe: I see. Now run along and play with some friends.
Mina: Okay! But!
Joe: She grow up so fast.
[At the playground]
Mina: Hi guys. You like my pretty dress? It's so stylish.
Boy 1: Where did you get that dress? The 50's store?
Boy 2: Lame-O!
Mina: I just made it myself. When I grow up, I wanna be a fashion model.
Boy 3: Fashion smashion. You don't have what it take! [he makes Mina's dress filthy]
Mina: Stop it! That's not funny!
Boy 4: Here's some mud! [he puts mud on Mina's dress]
Boy 5: Have some of this! [he messes Mina's hair]
Joe: HEY! Leave Mina alone! You can't treat here like that!
Boys: Run away! [they flee]
Joe: Are you okay, Mina?
Mina: Yeah. Those boys are bullies.
Joe: Yeah. Your real parents takes down bullies like them.
Mina: Okay. What was my real parents like?
Joe: They were just like you. Your dad was strong, funny, and cool. And your mom was courageous and pretty. And she also had long hair like you.
Mina: Hey! Watch the hair!
Joe: Relax! I was just fixing it! There.
Mina: Thanks Dad. I'll be like my parents and these those bullies a lesson.
Boy 1: That guy is very bad!
Boy 2: He's scary!
Boy 3: And mean!
Boy 4: And cranky!
Boy 5: Uhhh... I don't know the other word.
Boys: It's Mina! And she's very mad!
Mina: HI-YA! [she beats up the boys] Never mess with my life. Ever.
Old Prison Guard: And that's how she got her courage. 5 years later, she shows her dresses at school.
[5 Years Later, at Elementary School]
Mrs. Teacherwoman: Mina Sanchez. Show me your career.
Mina: Okay. When I grow up, I wanna be a fashion model and designer. [she puts on one dress] Hey! [she puts on another] Whoo! [she puts on another] Yeah!
Boy 1: Hey, Mina. There's mud on one of those dresses! [he throws mud at Mina's dress] [laughing]
Mina: Grrrr... [she beats up a boy]
Old Prison Guard: After many years, Mina shows her dresses, and beats up some bullies who made fun of her. And after graduation, she becomes a fashion designer.
[11 Years Later, Mina designs dresses]
Mina: There. It's finished.
Joe: Wow, Mina! You're doing a great job!
Mina: Yep. My real Mom and Dad will be very proud, if they're still alive.
Joe: Okay. Now go out there and show some dresses!
Mina: Okay. [she puts on a 60's mod dress] Look at me!
[At the fashion show]
Announcer: And now, here's Mina Sanchez!
Mina: Ladies and gentleman. Behold, these dresses! This is the polka dotted one! And this is the stripes de France! And this is my favorite one. And bell sleeves. You like them?
Boys: Hey! Your dresses look filthy! [they throws mud at Mina's dresses] [laughing]
Mina: HOW DARE YOU!!! [she beats up the boys]
Old Prison Guard: [laughing] That was fun! Never mess with her dresses.
John: Yeah! What happens next?
Old Prison Guard: Oh yeah? Ah yes! My favorite part! After a disasterous day, Mina was outraged about it.
Mina: AAAHHH!!! I can't take it anymore! Those bullies always mess with my life! Nobody messes with my life!
Lacey Shadows: Hello there, Mina.
Mina: Tina? You're alive? YAY! You're alive!
Lacey: Get off me! And stop calling me Tina! I'm Lacey Shadows now. Baron Vain raised me.
Mina: Did you say Baron Vain? The one who killed my parents?
Lacey: Yes. Time to say goodbye. [she beats up Mina and breaks all of her bones]
Baron Vain: Hello there, Mina. Are those dresses yours?
Mina: Don't touch them!
Baron Vain: [laughing] This is more fun that a barrel full of monkeys! Lacey! Now!
Lacey: Yes, boss. [she pours gasoline at Mina] [laughing] [she puts a lot of explosives at the building]
Baron Vain: Say goodbye, Mina! Prepared to suffer that same fate as your parents.
Mina: Touch my life, and you're dead meat!
Baron Vain: You're dead meat. [he lights a match and sets fire at a building] Chao! [laughing]
Mina: VAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!!!!!!!!!! [the building explodes, sending Mina up in the air and into the water]